Halloween is catching

This sucks. I’ve managed to spend a good chunk of my life not participating in Halloween. I take that back. I’ve gone to parties, but I’ve only put on a costume twice after the age of 7. And one of those I dressed in my dormmates clothes and went as black (hotter and smarter) version of her.

Anyway…the point is that I don’t do Halloween. People ask me what my costume will be and I say, “Mom” or “black chick”. This year…oh man, this year my little girl is totally into Halloween. Today’s she’s wearing black leggings and an orange shirt someone gave her last year that says, “I love my mummy!”. She wants me to put the Halloween hair ties someone gave her last year in her head.

It has spread.

This past weekend, I went to the 99 cent store and bought a few Halloween decorations, thinking that should be enough for her. Then we got paid. Party City here I come! I bought tombstones, spiderwebs, garlands and lights. Then we got paid again. Yesterday, we went to one of those Halloween stores and got a window light and string lights. Today, I bought a fog machine. I couldn’t not buy it. It was $20! That’s like $30 – $40 cheaper than all the other fog machines I’ve seen. I came thisclose to buying some skeleton thing that makes scary noises. The only thing that stopped me was that Ilia was shaking in terror at it. What else did I get? Oh, more tinsel and I almost got Marcus the Carcass, but thought it would look pretty cheesy during the day.

Speaking of day time effects…I sat there in Target today thinking, “Gosh, I wonder if I could get some old leaves from somewhere and bring them onto the lawn. That would be perfect for Falloween!” Dork. See, we only have this hugeass palm tree in front of our house and the only thing it drops is seeds. Not very autumn-y anyway. Palm trees. What the hell were the city founders thinking importing these things? How am I supposed to create an evil, haunted house when my place looks like a Spanish reject? It’s times like these I wish we had moved to South Pas. They have streets of oaks and maples willfully changing colors and dropping their leaves and being all fall-like.


Our house is Halloweened. Yesterday, I put up banners, tapes, garlands and spiderwebs. This was before we went to the Halloween store and have a serious conversation about where we’d store a life-size mummy and or coffins. Me. I mock people who decorate for Christmas, with a “Why bother, it’s only one day” and here I am wobbling on my ladder so I can the spider web stuff up high for full effect. I’m going to turn into one of those freaks like that guy in Hancock Park that overdecorates his lawn for all major holidays and even not so major ones. You know, that guy who brings in the Ferris wheel for Easter? That’s going to be me. I just know it.